Tuesday, July 08, 2008

That Time Of Life

I was at the dollar store in Vanderhoof when my life changed.

I had bought a package of envelopes and the store clerk asked me if the senior citizens discount applied. Apparently they have a policy that Mondays is senior citizens discount day. If your over 55. I am. This month I will be 58. I took the discount. And went into midlife crisis. Now I know, technically, that it's midlife only if I plan on living until I am 116.

I immediately explained to Jo-Ann and the perplexed clerk, that I was leaving her for a blond 20 year old. Perhaps several. And buying a red convertible. And a motorcycle. I was going to grow a pony tail and call guys "Dude". And wear gold chains.

On the other hand --joining an Ashram was kind of appealing. Perhaps I could take the name "Pukawongolamablom". I probably would look very spiritual wrapped in saffron.

Jo-Ann took it rather hard. She was gurgling and laughing nervously when we left the store. I beleive she was making peace with my upcoming life changes.
Usually she doesn't take my remonstances too seriously. This time I could see that she knew I ment business.

Today I am building trusses for the garage remake, with my brother, Tiny. Perhaps I will explain to him my upcoming change in life path. My spiritual quest. I am sure he will be supportive. He will cover up his excitement for me with some expletives. He is like that.

Time frame I am not sure of. Maybe after the fall harvest. That should be in about two weeks. Less if we eat a lot of zuchinni.

Ommmm, dude.

5 comments:

Daughter One said...

Don't worry Dad, I'll buy you the expensive diapers for the Seniors Home... they won't show as much through your mid life crisis leather pants.

ablom said...

Yellow leather pants.

Kevin said...

that way the pee stains won't show

Anonymous said...

ha hah ha
lol lol
glad to hear midlife effects all men the same way
come to think of it maybe I should look for a few youngerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
males
Kim

Carol Browne said...

YELLOW leather pants? Make sure you wear that "kiss a moose hat" at the same time. YEEEIKES!